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Trusting Your Thirties.

That magic double digit number that confirms the reality of getting your shit together. The double digit number that pushes you to confirm your double figure salary. While I’m on the topic of figures its also the number that defines if gravity is really catching up with you or leaving you behind. Let’s face it ladies 30 can be a wicked bitch. I embarked on this journey and for the first half of the journey I was pretty bummed. The mere thought of me being on Earth for thirty years without much to show for it had me kicking myself in the ass.

I suppose my first mistake was going down my vision list that I made when I was 20. It was my idea to draft this list,adding as the years went on to see what I could accomplish in 10 years. What I didn’t account for when I made that list was all the curve balls that life would throw my way. Those curves being Sallie her bestie Mae and losing a major job in my career field at 25. I also didn’t add in the amount of time and heartache I would endure while trying to find the husband that was #5 on my list to have my beautiful family at age 26 which was #7.

As I went item line for item line I realized that the true blessing in turning thirty was just that. With all of the mishaps and downfalls I still managed to stay in the game and that in itself was the one item I forgot to add to my list. As ambitious beings we sometime forget to take that moment of clarity and pat ourselves on the back for a job well done. Sure my breasts may not be that perfect ripe C cup that they once were and my eyes may carry a little more baggage than the year before. Yet with that change comes evolution. The evolving of becoming a woman is being able to take what you have and find a way or make one to achieve what you desire.

It’s about not becoming stagnant when the wind of missed opportunity hits you square in the face. It’s about defining your strengths and utilizing them to bury your limitations. Thirty is trusting yourself to know that no matter what is ahead of me I am mentally and emotionally mature enough to get through it. I came to the realization that Thirty isn’t about finding true love it’s all about falling in love with your true self. Knowing that no matter what happens you have yourself and that is a beautiful comfort. IMG_8299


 While a little reluctant I slowly begin to embrace the sexy side of my thirties. The freedom to do what you feel without explanation. You feel wise enough to not make childish mistakes yet liberated enough to let your guard down and do whatever the hell you want. Thirties are the years to selfishly go after that job that requires you to move clear across town, or quit your terrible job and take the time to find a new one that you’ll love going to everyday. It’s a time for you to LIVE! So as I begin to embark on the first half of my thirties I did create a new vision list and this time around I only have one expectation of myself “Live More.”

From the heart of Ebony S. Garris