I was at a party with a group of friends when I noticed a cutie standing across the room. I had been out of my last relationship for two years and felt like I didn’t even know how to talk to guys anymore. It was like I lost my rhythm, but I was so determined to get it back and this was going to be my start. I decided not to tell my friends I thought he was attractive, because I knew they might try to blow my cover. So I took a deep breath, tried to play it cool and decided that I was going to walk over and talk to him. As soon as I was ready to make that move; he gave me a please don’t come over here stare. (Well at least that’s what I thought)
I asked a friend of his that I knew if he was single and if he knew his Instagram. Luckily, he did! I won’t lie; I browsed to see what he was all about. (You know you’ve done this too) I hate talking on social media, but I still decided to DM him. Our conversation on Instagram was going great, but after a few hours of going back and forth I thought it was odd that he didn’t ask for my number to continue the convo. So no, it didn’t “go down in the DM.”
But I wasn’t going to stop there. I let a few days go by and I decided to DM him again. I guess my second attempt was good luck, because he finally asked for my number. I was so excited to be talking to someone new until I realized that this friendship or whatever it was, wasn’t going anywhere. He never tried to call me, schedule a FaceTime appointment or initiate a date. HE DID NOTHING! And to make matters worse he never attempted to get to know me. If someone were to ask him what he knew about me all he could say is he met me at a party and I live in Jersey. I kept trying to figure out what the problem could’ve been, but the obvious answer was that he just wasn’t into me and I accepted it. I stopped making attempts to contact him period. It wasn’t difficult for me to accept this, because it wasn’t like wedding bells were ringing from the moment I saw him. So before this happens to you ladies or if it has already here’s what you need to do:
It’s HIM NOT YOU
Just because someone can’t see how amazing you are doesn’t make you less amazing or not amazing at all. I’ll be honest, it took me a while to realize this, so if you have to keep reminding yourself do it! Maybe he’s still not over his ex or he has commitment issues. Who knows? What I do know is, there’s too many men out there to be stressing over one that fails to realize how great you are. You are fabulous and it’s his loss that he didn’t see that.
Enjoy your friends
Don’t sulk and feel like you need a pity party. Get up, get cute and go out! Aaliyah said it best! At first if you don’t succeed, dust yourself off and try again! You won’t meet any guys sitting on the couch so call your friends, put on your best jeans and beat that face to capacity. Mr. Right is out there somewhere.
Enjoy your own company first
Don’t be so hard on yourself. He’ll be sorry, trust me. It’s fine to be sad for a minute, but once that minute is done get up and go kick some ass. (not physically) Whatever you love, go explore it. Whatever your good at it, get better at it. The best revenge is living well. You don’t need to be awesome to spite him, but you need to be awesome in spite of him. Always remember that!
I’ll let you in on a secret, the same guy that wasn’t interested in me and made absolutely no effort to get to know me is now constantly blowing up my phone asking to hang out with me. *hair flip*
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